So what does it really mean to be a “good father?” Well, there’s definitely not just one answer to that question and it honestly depends on your family’s dynamics. The reason it’s so hard to give a definite answer on what being a good father really is, is due to the fact that the role of a father has drastically changed over the years.
Seven to eight decades ago, the role of the father was simply to be the breadwinner of the household. He would, of course, spend time with his children and wife, but for the most part, working and being a provider for his family was his main focus. Today, fathers make it a point to have the best of both worlds by working and providing for his family.
Why the Shift in Responsibility as a Father?
The fact that fathers today make a point to have the best of both worlds, now makes you question why they’re so adamant on being such a good father to their kids? There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that by any means but it just kind of makes you wonder where and when the shift in responsibilities as a father came in… For most men, this shift in responsibilities and desire to be active in their child’s life is typically the result of their relationship with their own father.
This shift in responsibility is coming from one of two reasons:
- The father wants a better relationship with his kids than he had or had with his own father. Once men become fathers, they often make promises to themselves that they wouldn’t do their kids the way their dad did him.
- The father had a great relationship with his father and wants his children to experience the same kind of love he experienced growing up.
Several studies have been conducted and revealed that children who were raised in homes with warm and affectionate fathers tend to have good academic achievements, positive self-esteem and self-image, and socially thrive. Although the definition of a good father varies from family to family, there are a few attributes of a man that makes him a great father, see if you embody some of those characteristics.
Spend Time With Your Kids
Being present to spend time with your kids is probably the biggest part of being a good father to your kids. Spending time with your kids doesn’t always necessarily mean that you’re taking them somewhere either. You can spend good quality time with them having fun at home. You can learn a stuffed pepper recipe, get in shape with your kids, and just do nothing with your kids. When your kids are young, they’re just happy with your presence, so sometimes sitting around watching TV or rolling around in the grass is just fine with them, as long as they’re in your presence, they’re happy.
Be Loving Towards Your Wife
What a lot of people don’t realize is that being a good father starts with being a good husband. Having a child takes teamwork from the mother and father and as a father, it’s important that your kids see you show acts of love and kindness to your wife. Sure, they know you love them but they also need to see that you love their mother as well.
It’s your actions towards your wife that let them know they’re loved by both parents and are in a safe and stable environment. That’s not saying that kids can’t feel love in a single-parent home but if your child is in a two-parent home, you need definitely need to make it very clear to your children that you two love each other. According to sheknows.com, showing affection towards each other sets the standard for them as to what a loving relationship looks like.
Be a Good Role Model
Last but not least, leading by example is one of the biggest ways to be a good father to your kids. As a father, one of your most important responsibilities is to train them and protect them. As your kids grow older, the words you use around them, you need to make sure they have meaning… even simple words like “yes” and “no” need to have meaning to them.
This is very important because kids learn by imitation, so what does that mean for you? That means you have to watch your language around them… No curse words or acting in ways that would cause them to behave negatively.