How Not to Pitch a Daddy Blogger

I’m a dad and a blogger, so I guess that makes me a daddy blogger.

Well, I’m called papa at home, so I’m actually a papa blogger. A natural papa blogger. So there. Anyway, because bloggers lead such influential and exciting lives (*snort*), we have a party in our inbox(es) all the time!

I get oodles of press releases and product pitches every single day, and the majority of them get a quick scan and are then sent directly to the trash. If you want to make sure that your pitch doesn’t see the light of day, just follow these rules:

You’re doing it wrong: How not to pitch a daddy blogger

1. Use automated system to insert [my name] at the top of a press release. For example, “Dear Mr. Papa”, “Dear Natural”, or “Mr. Derek”. Or even “Dear Blogger”. Then, don’t proofread the emails before sending them.
2. Just copy and paste your press release into the email with no note to me whatsoever.
3. Make sure your press release is at least a thousand words long, has really long paragraphs, and put long quotes from the company CEO in there.
4. Call your press release a ‘news’ release.
5. Don’t put a summary of the pitch at the beginning.
6. Attach lots of images and include all the nitty-gritty details in the email.
7. Make a big deal about a press release that has no story and no hook to it.
8. Send me pitches that have nothing to do with anything on my site.
9. Send me the same pitch you send to mommy bloggers.
10. Ask me to review a product I’ve never used.

Results are anything but typical. Your mileage may vary.

Image: Nima Badiey at Flickr